Archive for February, 2008

Classic XI: US Presidents

February 26, 2008

GK: Dwight D. Eisenhower – Popular with the fans. Good distribution out of the back.

RB: Ulysses S. Grant – Unspectacular in attack, but grinds down opponents and never gives an inch. Refuses to accept a draw as a positive result, demands unconditional surrender from his enemies.

CB: Abraham Lincoln – Leader of Men. Calm in the face of adversity. Good feet, goal threat on set pieces.

CB: George Washington (C) – Defends, defends, defends and then before you know it he attacks, sneaking up through midfield, across the Delaware River, and into the opponent’s half ready to shoot from distance or make a late run into the penalty box. Rises above petty dressing room politics, universally beloved by fans. Has endeared himself to the press with his innate honesty.

LB: Harry S. Truman – Will go 75 minutes without making a mark on the game, and then -BOOM- he’ll drop a really big ****ing bomb you. Free-kick specialist.

RM: Teddy Roosevelt – Covers every blade of grass, gets stuck in. Relies more on will and his reputation than on skill. Sent the 7th fleet around the world.

CM: Calvin Coolidge – Calm and camposed, sweeps up behind the skill players and makes sure the whole engine clicks. All business.

CM: Andrew Jackson – Sparkplug, dynamo of team. Attacks relentlessly. Utterly ruthless, just ask the Cherokees. Loved by few, hated by many, respected by all.

LM: Richard Nixon – Tricky bastard. Good footwork, occasionally tries to do to much. Never beats a man once when he can beat him twice. At the same time never stays beaten for long.

F: George H. W. Bush – When he attacks you feel it. Defeated vaunted Iraqi Army in 100 hours. Dismantled Juve in 60 minutes. Also creates for teammates, builds fluid attacking moves, international coalitions.

F: James K. Polk – Leads the line. Combative, feels he has a god-given right to the field. Frequently off-side, but just as frequently in the right place at the right time, ready to poke in a loose ball, or annex Texas.

Manager: Ronald Reagan – Good communicator, good man-manager. Leaves the Xs and Os to his number two.

Trainer: Lyndon Baines Johnson – Sees all the moves, knows how to crack the toughest defense or the toughest filibuster. Hasn’t performed quite as well in the manager’s chair. A natural number 2.

Predictions, Predictions, Predictions

February 14, 2008

CCN tipped me off to this little number so here’s how I see the season turning out.

The top four:

1. Man U. 87

2. Arsenal 86

3. Chelsea 79

4. Liverpool 77

5. Everton 72

6. Aston Villa 70

7. Man City 65

8. Portsmouth 62

9. Tottenham 57

10. Blackburn 54

11. West Ham 49

12. Newcastle 43

13. Middlesbrough 40

14. Sunderland 32

15. Fulham 30

16. Bolton 29 (-20 GD)

17. Birmingham 29 (-22 GD)

18. Wigan 29 (-34 GD)

19. Reading 29 (-36 GD)

20. Derby 11

In the relegation fight, I have Fulham surviving by a point, finishing the season thusly:

Fulham 1-1 West Ham

Fulham 0-2 Man U

Blackburn 2-2 Fulham

Fulham 1-2 Everton

Newcastle 0-2 Fulham

Derby 0-0 Fulham

Fulham 2-1 Sunderland

Fulham 1-1 Reading

Fulham 0-3 Liverpool

Fulham 0-1 Man City

Fulham 1-1 Birmingham

Portsmouth 1-0 Fulham

Roy’s made the team hard to beat and you can’t say fairer than that. I see a lot of draws and a lot of losses, but with the bottom of the table so rotten this year, two wins may very well be enough to survive. We’ll find out.

Blind Item of the Day

February 11, 2008

Who could David James be talking about?

“The three days have been very, very different,” he said. “The rules are strict. We all have to eat together, get to the table on time and we leave when everyone is finished.

“The difference is that in the past people would go in, have two minutes of food and then run off. When you’re with your team-mates it might be a mundane conversation but it’s nice to actually have a conversation and build a relationship with the guy rather than think ‘he’s off again, that lad who plays for so-and-so’.

“At first, you are looking at people and thinking ‘hurry up’. It gets frustrating when people have second helpings of puddings but it was good.”

Who? Who? Who?

Hello world!

February 11, 2008

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