Hackwatch Vol. 2

F365:

HODGSON HOPES TO PLAY HIS JOKER

Fulham coach Roy Hodgson believes veteran striker Jari Litmanen could yet play a crucial role in their fight for Barclays Premier League survival.

Actual quotes by Roy Hodgson:

“To know Jari Litmanen as I did, having worked with him, and to know we could get him here was just a great joker to play in our pack,” said Hodgson.

“At the moment, because he hasn’t been fully able to get himself fit to figure, it’s not been a fortunate joker but still a good one to have around.

“You can’t have too many front players. They’re the ones that injuries happen to and they lose form, so you can never have too many going into a situation like we are.

“I’m delighted to have Jari around. He is playing with his usual enthusiasm. He’s certainly not match fit but he might just get there.

“I’m lucky in the sense that with McBride and Johnson doing well I don’t miss Jari quite so much as I may have done had it been a disastrous situation.

“I may have been looking in midweek and saying ‘My God, when are you going to be fit?’. But I can be more relaxed about it because the other guys are doing okay.

“When Jari is mechanically fit he’s never far away from being match fit. He keeps himself very fit. When we (Finland) played Azerbaijan he hadn’t played for a football team for five months. He’d not done one training session outside of the Finnish national team and he played 90 minutes.

“He’s contracted to us until the end of the season and then we’ll take a further assessment of the situation and talk to him again. Who knows – maybe he’ll be fit and we’ll like what we see and want to keep him for next season.”

Fair play. It’s more dramatic than, “Fulham coach Roy Hodgson believes veteran striker Jari Litmanen could yet play a role in their fight for Barclays Premier League survival, maybe, if everything else goes horribly, horribly wrong.”

Bonus: Structure of the article: 5 paragraphs of ‘analysis’, 8 paragraphs of quotes, 3 paragraphs of ‘analysis’, 7 paragraphs of quotes.

Now, wouldn’t it be easier, more efficient, and more informative to simply print transcripts? What was the value added of these 8 paragraphs written by our anonymous hack? His additions are either misleading, rewording of Hodgson’s comments which immediately follow, or contain basic information, such as “Five of their remaining eight games are away from Craven Cottage and Fulham have not won on their travels for 18 months.”

I see a market out there for some enterprising journalist. Next time you are assigned to craft an article out of an interview touching on several disparate subjects with no common theme, just submit a transcript of the quotes, perhaps, but not necessarily, with headings such as ‘ON RELEGATION’ or ‘ON JARI LITMANEN.’ Then, take your sloping forehead and protruding brow down to your nearest bar, and order a pint. You’ve earned it, son.

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